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An Evening With Orlando

by David Shaw

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1.
Hang In Life 03:16
u wouldn't believe me if i tried to give you my reasons for hanging on to life and i couldn't tell u if i knew the myriad ways of forgetting 'past' and 'truth' oh, i'm not the kind of person to be polite so i'm not the kind of person that people like u wouldn't believe me if i said 'i can never determine if i'm alive or dead' 'nothing is holding in its place' 'there's nothing convincing to me in time or space' oh, i've tried to be a person but i just melt if i'm not exactly a person i'm something else
2.
i'm afraid of being loved 'cause i'm afraid what's in my heart is not enough but you make me want to try and hang with all the ghosts i'm supposed to keep inside i'm afraid of being bored so i'll take anything to let me stay indoors but you make me want to leave when i'm alone you are the only thing i need it's a kind of a joke when i say 'i'm fortified' it's a kind of a joke when i'm taking sides it's a kind of a blur, but i'm staying overnight, right? it's a kind of a blur, but i'm still alive. i'm afraid of being wrong i'm afraid i can't communicate at all but you make that seem okay u are the only thing i ever want to say
3.
Tongue-Tied 03:30
and i was tongue tied, yeah yr love was just the place to be and i was so shy, but u know i didn't want to leave and it was easy, i could tell you anything on my mind it's so easy, to say 'i need u' when our tongues are tied you're waiting for the right time you're waiting for the smart investment i'm hoping for a clear line i'm hoping it'll all make sense at once and u can be it all, you can be the lead between the lines and u can see it all, you can see the light beneath the pines you're waiting for a new day you're counting down the hours till this one ends i'll play it like i'm insane, it doesn't mean a thing and it all depends on anything at all, yeah everything is counted one by one so pin it to the wall, remember it when everything is done
4.
do you remember the days when i gave 'a good god damn' you'll never see me again, but will u miss it when i'm not around? darling i'm trying to be a man, a serious man darling i'm trying to understand, i'm making a stand and when i'm smiling, i'm doing the best that i can and when i'm crying, i'm crying like a man can you tell me again why you never want to be alone? you said: 'i thought we were friends, but you're never picking up the phone' darling i'm keeping it underground, it's under the ground darling i'm making my only sound, my only sound
5.
i'm falling behind, i'm leaving it right where i need it i'm always alive, but not as alive as i need it and it falls, and it falls, and it falls apart again and you call, and you call, and you call and it never ends if nothing is real, well how am i supposed to feel? cause nothing is real, but i need a way to deal. there's nothing to prove, i'm not going to lose myself thinking we don't get to choose. we don't see our eyes when they're blinking. and it flows, and it flows, and it flows around again. and it goes, and it goes and it goes and you just pretend. if nothing is wrong, then why do i just sing the same songs? cause nothing is wrong, but nothing is left when i'm gone. i love you to the max i love you to the max i love you to the max i love you to the max i love you to the max i love you to the max i love you to the max i love you to the max

credits

released May 17, 2016

songs i wrote to as a coping mechanism while attending graduate school

written/performed/produced by dave shaw

spoken word intro from 'falling behind' excerpted from a 1993 mckenna lecture lol

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David Shaw Montreal, Québec

song and dance man

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